Today is a brand new start to my blog. Have been pondering for quite awhile as to whether to start this. But I guess its a way of releasing my inner feelings.

Sometimes, when I look at Torres, I think of Cathlene. The vivid memories of holding her when shes still around. Its been 1 year 4 mos since shes gone but the thought of her still bring tears into my eyes. How much I miss her...

Although I know Darling misses her too but he has told me to look forward. I guess its easy to say but difficult to fulfil. Wonder how she looks like now. Is she doing well in Heaven?

I always have the guilt towards her. Be it being my fault or not.

I always tell Charlene and Torres to grow up well, be it in personality or health. Thats what most mummies will hope for.

I happen to come across this just now. cried in the toilet as its so beautiful but sad... thanks Cathlene
Daddy, please don't look so sad,Mama please don't cry~ "Cause I am in the arms of Jesus and He sings me lullabies." Please, try not to question God, Don't think he is unkind Don't think He sent me to you, and then He changed his mind. You see, I am a special child, and I'm needed up above I'm the special gift you gave Him, the product of your love. I'll always be there with you and watch the sky at night, Find the brightest star that's gleaming, That's my halo's brilliant light. You'll see me in the morning frost, that mists your window pane. That's me in the summer showers, I'll be dancing in the rain. When you feel a little breeze, from a gentle wind that blows That's me, I'll be there, planting a kiss on your nose. When you see a child playing, and your heart feels a little tug, That's me, I'll be there, giving your heart a hug. So Daddy, please don't look so sad, Mama don't you cry. I'm in the arms of Jesus and He sings me lullabies.